HELP!

Okay... as you all can tell by the title of my blog, I am very busy and going crazy! I am a working Mom and therefore always need help! If any of you can send me advice, any advice on how to customize my page and bling it out like ya'll have... please do! I just haven't had time to research and mess with it. THANKS and HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!!!!!!!!!

I'M GETTING REAL AND LETTING GO!

Okay, from here on out I am going to use this as my venting page. I have heard as females we need like five hugs a day, and to use up approx. 10,000 words. Well, I know that I am nowhere close to that by days end. So this is my new vent page, gossip page, what have you. I plan on letting loose. This page will not be for me to walk around to my friends and say... Hey... check this out... My blog is at... Absolutely not! This is for me and my followers and friends I make along the way I guess. I love meeting new people, but most of all, I love meeting people who still have a little compassion and sunshine in their souls.
I decided yesterday that I would start this blog as a way to release pent up emotions w/out burdening people with my heartaches or woes. Don't get me wrong, I have some great friends that are there for me... but I sure don't want to burden them or seem like a whiner all the time.
So... I have created my Drama blog. Everyday I will use this to vent about the crap that is happening in my office, life, with my co-workers, etc.
I hate confrontation, but unfortunately people mistake my kindness for weakness all too much. Sometimes confrontation is inevitable. I still hate it and avoid it at all costs. The problem with that? It can lead to gossip as a means of venting. The flip side to all this is that sometimes, no matter how right you are or justified... you still can't confront someone for various reasons. So again... MY VENTING BLOG is born! Maybe I will create a following... maybe like a soap opera. Ha! Ha!
I can see it now...
"STEPHANIE'S WORLD... these are the days of her life!!!" Well, since I have to return to work... I will post my first official "venting" blog here a little later! I can't wait! I will however try to stay on one topic at a time for my own sanity. We shall see... I think I will also end each blog/ day with a special thought...
This is my thought/ inspirational phrase for the day... my favorite...

"Smile at EVERYONE you meet, smiles are contagious. You never know, just when you need it the most, that smile just might make it's way back around to you."

Food, food, stupid food.

Ya know, I don't even know if anyone will ever even read this blog... but that's okay. I created this for my venting space. I am really frustrated with myself and my life right now. Don't get me wrong, I know that I am very blessed. I have two beautiful children... whom I was worried I couldn't have this time ten years ago. I also have an amazing husband. I get frustrated with him at times because we are so different. Actually I get mad at myself in a way for falling in love with him! It is our difference though that make us stronger at times too. I love to play sports, and he could care less. I am a bubbly person, he is laid back... but we can meet in the middle. I have always liked tall, dark and mysterious, Well he is tall, blonde, and not necessarily mysterious... hermit tendencies yes... a loner... somewhat. So we butt heads, but love each other very much. The frustration stems from our place in life, and from my constant procrastination and weakness over my health and eating habits. I am not necessarily fat my any means, but ya... I'm pushing the envelope. I am unhealthy. I am 5' 4" and I weigh 155 lbs. and I have know for awhile that my cholesterol is high and my sugar is bad. I kept promising I would start back playing sports and exercising, and then suprise... I was pregnant with my son. He was born in July 2007. Ever since then I have been planning this radical lifestyle change, and it has yet to happen. So a couple of months ago I went to the doctor and started seeing a nutritionist. It has helped, but I am still slacking! I know a lot of it is how busy I am as Mom, T-Ball Mom, Wife, and full time worker. I stay frazzled. I have yet to take any of the medicine the doctor gave me correctly or at least consistantly, and exercise? What? All meds should be taken at night, and I after get the kids in bed after a long day at work... I crash and forget. As far as the exercise goes, this is my excuse: I get up at 5:00 a.m. (okay 5:30) in order to get myself and kids ready - hubby does help which is great. Daughter has to be at school by 7:15 a.m. It is just starting to get light by then. I pick up kids and get home by about 6:30, feed them, bathe them, do homework, and put them in bed. Usually by then it is between 8:00 and 9:00 - dark outside once again. By then it is time to clean up the tornado that just went through my house, clean the kitchen, and get clothes and stuff ready for the next day. When it is pretty outside, I do walk some at lunch... but lately my workload is so heavy I eat in about 15 min. and go back to work. So... there is my delima. I am stubborn, and if I can't be outdoors... I just don't want to exercise. I could do a treadmill I guess, but I have tried that route and it just took up too much space in our little house and got so boring. I think what I am going to do is starting coming home and giving the kids a light snack/ dinner and immediately going walking. Hubby and I are going to get each other bikes for Christmas, and biking burns more calories than walking. He will bike with us, but he won't walk. So that will be nice. I guess what it all comes down to is that I am mad that I have to work and I can't exercise when I want to. My busy life really cuts into preperation time. I just get tied up in other things and don't have the time to be Mrs. Super Prepared and have little salads made up for the next day, or even lunch packed for myself. So I have retreated to eating Smart Ones frozen meals which are packed with Sodium. Now the nutritionist has told me my sodium is high. To make things worse, I work for a very elite company that many vendors want to do business with, or stay in business with... so four days out of the week we have huge breakfasts come in. It is soooooooooo hard to stay away. Yesterday was breakfast tacos and turnovers and fruit, kolaches and homemade cinnamon rolls. Today is Breakfast croissants w/ egg and bacon or sausage, huge homemade cookies, and fruit. Fridays are usually brisket tacos and donuts. If I come to work hungry, I just can't turn that stuff down. AGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!Anyways, I have been planning for the last two weeks to do the first phase of south beach and cleanse my system of sugar and carb cravings. My friend sells Pharmaceutical grade vitamins and supplements, and she has a week long system called Reset. She gave me that to help cleanse my system. I have to be in the right mindset though to get started, it will be a difficult two weeks of cleansing and eating so different. Since I just scarfed down a cookie and croissant, today would not be that day. I know that things are going to get better and work themselves out. I am just not happy not getting to do the things that I want to do. I have a five year old and a one year old. The one year old makes it hard to be able to get out much when it is 100 deg. outside, so not much outdoor activity took place this summer. Not that he is getting older, maybe things will start to get better. There is also a Golds Gym over close to my house. They stay open long enough that I could go in the evenings if it wouldn't keep me up after I got done. I used to run cross country and could still crash afterwards though, so who knows? I have a garage full of stuff for a garage sale and can't get to the jogging stroller through it all... so the sooner I can have the garage sell - the better. I would love to walk out the door this afternoon and start on my "new lifestyle" by walking or jogging and eating better... but I know that is very unlikely to be able to happen. Besides, daughter has a t-ball game this afternoon at 6:00 - so my time is out. I have considered not signing her up again in the Spring... but that seems so unfair to her. I'll really have to think about that one. I guess I will make all of my goals and wishes my New Years Resolution. By then it will be cooler down here in Texas and my garage will be cleaned out and we can just pull our bikes and jogging strollers in and out of the garage to use them. Now, if I can just hang tight, and quit beating myself up. Well, lots more thoughts about this swimming in my head, but I need to get to work before I don't have a job and don't have to worry about time!!!!!! :(

Just getting started!

Well, oncle again I am procrastinating. Just getting away from my work for a little while! Trying to clear my head. It is Friday and I am so burned out. This is my first time ever creating my own blog. It is all mine! I can't wait to get on here from home and tweek my new blog page! I have got to find out how to use it! I want to "bling" it out as they say. Well, off to Never Never Land to get lost in work. One more hour to go and then I am FREE! I think I will go shopping today! Oh wait... I need money for that!? Scratch that idea. Dang.